Sex School for Grown Ups presents Relaxing Into Pleasure. What does pleasure mean for you and how can you recognise it? How can you relax into a pleasurable encounter or relationship and stay aware of yourself?
Do you feel quite passive or nervous in the bedroom. Or do you start worrying about you’re getting it right? Or do you put up with stuff because you think someone else wants it and you don’t know how to change things? Yet you know you need to. Or do you put pressure on a partner for a particular outcome because you think he or she wants it, when really it’s your ego or fear in charge?
Performance Anxiety is rife and natural but it might not be what you think it is. So it’s time to explore what’s beyond it:
What might it be like to learn to feel more pleasure in your own body rather than worrying about someone else’s?
What might it be like to be relaxed and creative?
What might it be like to initiate the intimacy you want?
What might it be like to know what’s possible?
After all if we can’t imagine it, we can’t ask for it.
In these simple, profound and subtle series of three workshop sessions, based on Betty Martin’s radical life changing work on consent, somatic sex educator and Tantric Realist, Alison Pilling, will be leading us to explore about how we can relax more into pleasure rather than worry about performance. What is good for you? How to understand more about how to move your ‘measure of pleasure’ from ‘Am I doing it Right?’ to ‘Am I Enjoying this? And what would make it even Better?’
Using the model of the Wheel of Consent, if you want to be good at Giving, first you have to learn to Take. And learning how to feel more is the first step.
Focusing on Take/Allow these 3 sessions will be illuminating about what holds you back from expressing what you want. How can you be slightly braver and slightly naughtier and a lot more relaxed? Learning what YOU like and what’s possible is key. With friendly collaborators you’ll stop focusing on ‘over giving’ and come back to honesty. Stopping being ‘done to’ is powerful. Stopping being over focused on another’s pleasure allows us all to feel freer, more confident and empowered.
In a gentle and enjoyable blend of Alison’s work in Tantra, sexological body work and conscious kink you’ll come to understand the joys of initiating for yourself, understand more about your pleasure, learn about sensual, nurturing and erotic touch, learn to focus attention in your own body, be more creative and courageous, have fun meeting others in short encounters. There will be space to discuss your fears and hopes as a human who simply wants to be open about the longing to feel connection and pleasure. Understanding why, how and then what. Being a sex geek is fun and confidence building. Curiosity and courage is all you need. You can find out more about Alison and her work at www.sexschoolforgrownups.com
These sessions will be clothes on to allow focus, safety and deeper relaxation into feeling.
This is a series of 3 workshops designed to take you on a journey of discovery however it is possible to sign-up to the first workshop only.
16 September – Day 1 Creativity: How to feel. What to want? The Wheel. Why be willing? Who’s it for? What’s possible? Sensual Touch skills for the Terrified. Trust in yourself and others. How to be clear.
Often in pleasurable situations we’re focusing too much on someone else as we think thats what expected of us. And that can create performance anxiety for us and our partners.
This workshop looks at practical ways we can bring the attention back to ourselves, expand the repertoire of our experience and trust that our partner is happy with what’s happening using clear and communication skills.
If you’re nervous but want to be more confident, if you’re confused but want to be clearer, or shy and want to be a bit braver, this workshop will help you build trust, connection and a little bit of naughtiness. Connecting to your own sexual desire and energy with your clothes on is an art worth exploring.
14 October – Day 2 Sexuality: The Joys of Taking. Admitting you want it. Why No is a welcome change of direction not rejection. Courage to be you in all your desires, vulnerability and fun.
To touch and be touched, to have desire is a natural thing and once we admit that we can all breathe a little easier.
Betty Martin says that in order to be great at Giving, first you have to learn to Take. Being skilled at Taking allows everyone to be clear that ‘the pleasure is for you and you are taking the action’. So it’s a wonderful way of taking the pressure off and being generous in admitting you have a desire instead of hiding it in Giving. Being open and truthful is a key skill in intimacy so let’s explore what makes us hide our desires and how we might overcome our shyness, shame or fear of rejection. Moving through this can deliver confidence, acceptance and trust. And sexiness and power.
18 November – Day 3 Empowerment: Let’s Play. The Joys of Allowing. Be surprised and relax. For the confused at heart this is an intro to simple kink, building clarity and erotic charge. Explore your erotic leadership skills with kindness.
In this final workshop we explore how Taking skills can move us into the beguiling arena of ‘consensual non-consent’. This is a simple way into understanding the joys of Allowing on a deeper level. Safety and power sharing can add to the eroticism of leadership and peaceful surrender in an encounter. Exploring this aspect of Take/Allow encourages your voice, creativity and spontaneity with your shadows.
Admit it, you want to know how to take charge. Or to let go for a while. Come and play with the energy of this.
We aim to gender balance but can’t guarantee this.
The doors will open at 10.00 am for registration with the workshop proper starting at 10.30 am after which there will be no admittance. We finish at 5 pm.
We will be having lunch at the premises and you are welcome to either bring your own lunch or veggie food to share, and to join us.
The cost is as follows (please see our refund policy):
Take a Taste £10 + £0.56 – an evening taster session for the series.
Three Day Series
I wanna commit!
£285 + £10.24 PayPal Fee
I wanna keep my options open!
First Workshop: £125 + £4.61 PayPal Fee.
Workshops 2 and 3 £195 + £7.07. PayPal Fee
Full Price: £320 + £11.47 PayPal Fee.
There are a limited number of concession tickets available. Please message me if you think this applies to your circumstances.
Click the green tickets button and you will get taken to the payment screen where you will be given an option to either pay by PayPal or by bank transfer if you want to avoid PayPal fees (full instructions are provided there).
Tel Alison on 07984 443069
Detailed Direction at http://www.thepathwaysstudio.com/venue/directions