We have just passed “Blue Monday” (the third Monday in January), which is supposed to be the most depressing day of the year. I believe this is a pseudoscientific term coined to sell holidays. However there is plenty of evidence, scientific and anecdotal, to say that January is a month where people do feel down more than any other month of the year.
There is a kind of perfect storm of events that can create this feeling. Firstly, the busyness of the festive period has passed. Secondly, as a result of the busyness, many people are exhausted either physically and/or emotionally. This can mean one’s stress response kicks in which drain us further. Thirdly, spending time with significant others or family can put relationship dynamics into close focus. Relationship counsellors often acknowledge a post-Christmas peak in demand for their services. Fourthly, there is plenty of scientific evidence that the continuation of the cold and darker winter days can lead to low mood. In fact this is the peak time for Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD) which can induce serious depressive episodes during the darker months. Fifthly, the first signs of New Year’s Resolutions not being sustained and one might move into disappointment, self-blame and recrimination. Finally no one should underestimate the cumulative effects of the Pandemic where people tended to have worried more (resulting in stress) and have been forced into more isolation being cut off from both physical and emotional connection.
So here are Seven tips to help you emerge from January more positively:
1) Acceptance
As already stated there are many reasons for having low mood. These are natural responses to the circumstances you find yourself in, there is nothing “wrong with you” per se because you have these feelings. Despite this, people can often move into self-judgement because you are not feeling as you or others think you should be. My brother often says, “It is what it is” and that is true. Finding one’s compassionate heart for yourself, just as you might for someone else, is an important first step. Finding ways to care and nurture yourself, particularly at this time, will help you to be compassionate to yourself. A Danish selfcare practice used in the winter months is called Hygge (pronounced hoo-gah). It is a practice tapping into creating cosiness and self-care in the dark winter months and is one of the reasons Denmark, according to surveys, is one of the happiest places in Europe. What is it you can do to for yourself is kind and supportive to how you are feeling, maybe a little Hygge?
2) Get Outside
Whilst keeping cozy is one way of giving selfcare it is also scientifically proven that getting out into the daylight when it is available, promotes wellbeing. Being directly in daylight results in a boost in Vitamin D which has been scientifically proven to increase serotonin, improving mood, digestion and sleep cycles. Could you find daily opportunities to get outside in daylight?
3) Be Active
Regular exercise has a whole host of benefits but a key one is around mental health. It releases serotonin and also endorphins that improve one’s mood. If you can exercise with others, it can also help to reduce any feelings of loneliness and isolation. Exercise can be gentle or vigorous and by simply walking outside you could not only be exercising but also getting your Vitamin D dose! Could you make a small change to bring more exercise in your life? Maybe just walking up and down a flight of stairs when you don’t need to?
4) Eat Less Sugar
Sugar has many adverse effects on the body. The average sugar intake is around 100% more than the recommended dose (30 g). Excessive sugar consumption can exacerbate depression and anxiety by causing energy spikes followed by crashes, as well as messing with the neurotransmitters that help regulate our mood. Do you have an eating habit around sugar and is there something you could do to cut just a teaspoon’s worth a day?
5) Sleeping Better
Sleep is an essential part of wellbeing and certainly lack of sleep can lead to many health conditions including those associated with mental health. Lack of sleep can lead to irritability, anxiousness and low mood. One of the key things one can do is promote good sleep habits which lead to a greater feeling of refreshment. Most adults do not get enough sleep. Here are some facts about sleep needs and tips to improve sleep. Are you getting enough sleep?
6) Be Realistic in Making Change
I have already said that as early as January, New Year’s Resolutions start to fall apart. We make resolutions to encourage ourselves to reach goals that are hard to achieve without a serious decision. The fact that they are hard to achieve in many ways sets oneself up for failure, people often are overly ambitious with one big target. There is nothing wrong with a big target, but one needs to consider manageable steps (for you) to achieve this target.
Let’s take one of the above tips as an example. Say I want to have more sleep and felt I was getting to bed too late. Rather than saying I am going to bed an hour earlier I decide every night I will get to bed 5 minutes earlier. I will monitor my execution of this plan by recording daily the time I go to bed on a piece of paper (I put mine on the fridge) and see how many times I am successful over the course of a month. My experience is that most people can be at least 75% successful in getting to bed 5 minutes early. Once someone has done this the following month go to bed another 5 minutes earlier and if you continue this pattern in a year’s time you will have reached your target at least three quarters of the time. The secret is that is your journey to your target is in “bite size chunks,” you don’t “beat yourself up” if you have a slip or decide to have a late night and you can see your over all progress.
If you choose you can even have an accountability buddy or buddies where you share your progress together. The key is not to be competitive with each other but rather share kind support. What longstanding tasks/challenges do you have that would benefit from this approach?
7) Learn Something New.
Studies show that learning something new can physiologically improve brain health and memory. It can also boost one’s confidence giving a sense of achievement, increasing energy whilst reducing stress levels and symptoms of depression.
If you are interested in learning something new or indeed something new about oneself then I am running, together with Elara. This is an immersive, experiential, online journey designed to take a deeper dive into exploring your relationship with your patterns, including change, and how this may affect you and your relationships. We will do this by using the lens offered to us by Tantra. If this interests you then you can find out more here.
Finally, if you do feel overwhelmed and none of these suggestions appeal to you do find someone to talk to about the way you are feeling. If you don’t feel there is anyone in your life that you can talk to then use this page of resources as a starting point to find help.